I have finally found a not perfect solution: setting manually the height of the bar cell shrinks the foo cell (setting height=fit for the foo cell does not work).
\starttext
\startTABLE
\NC foo \NC[nr=2] \input knuth \NC \NR
\NC[height=28ex] bar \NC \NR
\stopTABLE
\stoptext
I have chosen 28ex for the height since linespace in ConTeXt equals to 2.8ex and I need the height of 10 lines in this example to fit the knuth paragraph (if I could find a way to get automatically the number of lines required to fit the knuth paragraph it would be better).